My Deserted Island Feature

My Deserted Island Feature by Elizabeth Mungle

Today we have the very last in the feature and it’s by Elizabeth.

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Character One:
Iris Black – ‘Iris & Ruby’ Rosie Thomas
In the book Iris Black initially resents, but soon grows to adore, the unexpected presence of her headstrong teenage granddaughter. (She calmly turns up on her doorstep unannounced, thousands of miles from home). Ruby’s sudden arrival signals the beginning of family forgiveness and unexpected friendship, forming over an initially daunting generation gap.
Now bear with me here, anyone who has read the book will want to point out that a) She is an ageing grandmother who uses a stick and never leaves the house.. b) is losing her memory and showing signs of dementia and c) doesn’t survive the book..
…this is a minor point, her ghost would be just as helpful.
Iris lives in Cairo, and so is used to sand (I’ve decided that this island is a hot sandy one just off the coast of Fiji, because we might as well tan whilst we’re stranded). She is strong willed and can handle a teenager (therefore can handle me; a 27 year old who acts like a teenager and can sulk better then her 14 year old cousin) and finally Iris worked for the British in World War 2, so would be full of stories to entertain us all until my fifth character acquires a boat from thin air…

Character Two:
Will Parry – The Subtle Knife’ from the ‘His Dark Materials’ fantasy trilogy, Phillip Pullman

The reason for this choice is pretty obvious. Will has a knife, (a subtle one) which can not only slice through any material but more importantly can cut windows into alternate worlds, such as a dry land-locked village with a working telephone, spa and chocolate stash.
Technically he is a 12 year old boy, so if he did appear on a deserted island with just me and an ageing grandma for company he may use the knife to disappear when we are both asleep, comatose from the amount of gin consumed whilst dancing round a weak signal fire.
(There’s always gin on a deserted island, remember that, Jack Sparrow says so.)

Character Three:
Alice Cullen – The ‘Twilight’ series by Stephenie Meyer

I’m pretty sure there aren’t many people who don’t know the basic plot of Twilight: She was a girl, he was a vampire, can I make it any more obvious.. (add in a few shape-shifters and more sparkly people) and so will dismiss this choice pretty quickly.
However, among the mainly weak-minded and stroppy characters, I found Alice a completely contrasting, headstrong, beautiful and useful vampire.
Not only will she fashion fabulous garments out of a few palm leaves and coconuts, making us all look like princesses (sorry Will) She also sparkles like a diamond in the sunlight, thus serving as a distress flare, but she can also see into the future! Alice Cullen can let us know when Will decides to leave us, or remind us to pace the gin, or perhaps see that we are about to wake up on said island in the first place and therefore prevent the whole thing from happening, so we can all go for a nice quiet picnic in the park (on a cloudy rainy, day obviously) ..or find that spa I mentioned.

Character Four:
Ok, so I got a bit stuck here… I read books, I really do! Usually 3-4 new ones a month! However I have concentration and memory problems and so I struggle to recall said books, even the really good ones, unless I read them a few times over. This explains why I can discuss Harry Potter for hours, because those 7 books get read repeatedly…
Anyway, I’ve decided to use that clever artistic licence thingybob that helps people out of such fixes, or maybe I’m just completely cheating and panicking slightly because this is due in today..
I’m picking someone from a film, AND I HAVENT READ THE BOOK but but but I am planning to, it’s next on my list I promise so please please don’t kill me. In fact, I will pack it now so I have it on the island, see, the book IS part of this project!

My fourth character has to be Samwise Gamgee– ‘The Lord of the Rings’ – J.R.R Tolkin.

Mainly because he is just so damn adorable!! He’s like a little puppy, all cute and rugged and loyal. I’ve done a bit of research *cough*wikipedia*cough* and it turns out as well as being pretty, he is a gardener! So that’s useful! He’d know what was edible and what was poisonous, he can cook and he can carry lots of things, including tired hobbits. Hey, it’s considered a deserted island, but you never know what’s hiding atop those tree people. (Apparently called Ents, thanks brother)
And! (yup, scrolling through wiki) he defeats a huge spider, and I’m terrified of spiders..finally (scrolling) he fathered 13 children, so should all other plans fail he is obviously fertile enough to create a new island population… I sense maybe I’m clutching at straws here.

Moving on, this last choice was the first person I thought of as soon as I read Victoria’s brief:

Character five: Molly Weasley – the ‘Harry Potter’ series- J.K.Rowling

Because, lets face it, she called Bellatrix LeStrange a b.i.t.c.h.
(Oh and she has a magic wand, which could prove useful…)

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